Take a chance……….

We limit ourselves in fear.  Fear of failure.  Fear of what people will think. Fear of what may or may not happen.  Fear of it not working the way we want.  FEAR!  We are afraid to take the plunge.  What if it doesn’t work out?  What if I mess everything up?  What if, what if, what if………………….. WELL…………. What IF…………………… it works out better than you thought?

Sometimes it may not work out the way you want.  But something will work out.  And maybe it will work out for the better!  We want to live a predictable life.  Live in the comfort zone.  If we know it, we can accept it.  But, sometimes, we need to take that plunge, jump out of the box, take the chance, and see what happens.  We think we know how life is going now.  We have a job, we pay bills, we visit family and friends, and whether good or bad, we know it so we accept it and it is comfortable.  Maybe not the life we want, but comfortable with the way it is and afraid to go out of it.  It is predictable.  It is safe.  Really, it is not.  Life changes everyday.  Sometimes in a dramatic way.  Loss of a job.  Loss of a loved one.  Loss of being you.  We go through the motions until LIFE changes it for us.  We change with it and keep going in the zone.  We have in our mind that if LIFE changes our lives, it is different than if we ACTUALLY tried to change it and took a risk to do something and possibly fail.  If LIFE does it, we have something to blame other than ourselves.  If we choose to make a change, and it doesn’t work, then we blame ourselves and who wants that?

You will never know unless you try.  You can live in your comfort zone and wonder What If for the rest of your life or you take the chance and see what happens.  If you take the chance, a few things will happen:

1.  It won’t turn out like you thought and it could be worse………………………….  BUT………….. you took the chance, you won’t have the “what if” and you learned experience and valuable lessons.  This will benefit you for your future so it is not a loss.

2.  It will work out the way you thought and you will be so happy you took the chance and you will have a brighter look on your life, yourself and your future.  Yeah!

3.  It will not turn out the way you thought and it turned out better than you could have ever imagined.  Bonus!!!

You have everything to gain. I am not talking about giving away all of your possessions and moving to some small island but even then people have done this and have turned out to be happier than before.  I am talking about asking the person out that you have been admiring.  Applying for that new job.  Moving to a new place. Investing time and/or money into a charity. Maybe leaving that painful relationship.  Standing up for yourself.  Do something that will make you happy!  Do something for YOU!

We can live with regrets but why should we?  When your life comes to an end, are you going to regret not taking that chance?  If the answer is yes, then do it!


  • Cathy

    I did this, I took a leap of faith to do the right thing for my family. Quit my job, moved across country to assist my older parents. It’s been a disaster. It blew up in my face. I’ve never been more miserable. I thought this through for over a year before I did it, but that doesn’t seem to have mattered. They need help, but only on their terms. It’s like I’m 5 years old again, and have to ask permission to leave the house. Is this a detour or my new life?

    • Toni Dowrey

      I apologize. I just now saw this message. I am not a therapist, I am a motivational coach. And in my only opinion, I believe it is a detour. It didn’t go as planned. Many things do not. I want to give you KUDOS for taking that leap. Although it did not turn out as you had hoped, you had the courage to step out and do something very big and many can only wish they had the courage to do. I can actually tell you that I understand some of this. I, too, have been trying to help my parents and it is on THEIR terms and very frustrating. We have to understand that we are adults but we are still their children and they will continue to see us this way. I also believe things happen for a reason. It is easier to see the negative than a positive message to be learned. One positive is that you get to spend time with your parents. Even if they can be frustrating and you feel it has been a disaster. You found strength to do something so bold in your life. There could be something you need to learn from the experience or a different reason you relocated that will better your future. We don’t always know the answers but sometimes we find them soon or sometimes it may take a while. Only you can chose if this will be your new life. You are the only one who will decide if it continues that way or you make changes to make it better. If you haven’t already, I can suggest to have a discussion with your parents and let them know the sacrifices you made to come and be with them. You understand you are their child but would like to help them and be treated as an adult. Let them know how much it meant to you to come out and be there for them and you want to do your best to make them happy. I would also plan YOU time. Take time for yourself to destress and relax. You need to replenish what is taken away. I hope this helped for you. Please let me know how things are going and I am here to discuss things with you. Have a great day and keep the faith. Toni Dowrey

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